C.K. A@rOn - Words of WISDOM

I would rather do nothing, but keep on reading.

For doing nothing, I can call myself idle labourer of mind.

While I am reading, don’t you think I am using my left as well as my right brains?

While I am reading, don’t you think I am working?

After reading, I feel exhausted. My mind was so tired.

My mind was insensible accompanied by the unpredictable weather. Humid air? Get off!

I am tired mentally, but not physically. Which one is more superior? Mentally or physically?

I realized my mind is conquering over my body. Mind is superior then?

Thinking makes me tired. Shall I stop thinking? Jogging exercises my endurance.

You probably heard of healthy body leads to healthy mind?

Shall I keep on jogging to have strong mind?

Or shall I take good care of my body for body is the temple of God?

For I have strong mind, I can keep on reading

I don’t want to close my eyes after 6 seconds of reading.

I want to keep on and surpass three hours of reading.

For my life would be in full satisfaction with a cup of coffee and a good book to read.

Thank You Lord, for the trials that come my way

In that way I can grow each day

As I let You lead

And I thank You Lord,

For the patience those trials bring

In that process of growing, I can learn to care

But it goes against the way I am

To put my human nature down

And let the Spirit take control of all I do

‘Cause when those trials come

My human nature shouts the things to do

And God’s soft prompting

Can be easily ignored

And I thank You, Lord,

For the victory that growing brings

In surrender of everything,

Life is so worthwhile

And I thank you Lord,

That when everything’s put in place

Out in front I can see Your face.

And it’s where You belong

Today is the day! Today is my first day of School Experience Programme. What day is today? Today is Monday! How do you perceive this day? DJ JJ and Rudy from 92.90hertz (If only you were living in the Hell of K) would say Monday Blue? Dear my friends, let’s change our mindset and called it MOTIVATING Monday? For the first day, my ‘girlfriends’ and I just went suck the humid air of the friendly-environment school. Examination was going on. Anyone who farted could even be heard by mosquitoes. What we were doing then? Chit-chatting meaningfully, girls were gossiping and keep mourning the word: boring, disturbing and honing my national language with other teacher in the staffroom, reading like a geek, shopping at the school. Task A left 80% and we just have to ask, smile, and communicate! Today is quite tiring. We signed off at 4.30pm because we took part in in-service Training. I could see vividly how the course Personal Leadership and School Management applied for the first day. In-service Training is one of the ways to enhance teachers’ professionalism. Scroll down a bit then you can read some details that I managed to jot down during the in-service Training……

Name of the Programme: Peranan Guru Sebagai Pendidik
(Kecemerlangan diri and organisasi)
Date: 25.5. 2009
Time: 2pm-4pm ( best time for taking my siesta)
Venue: Makmal Bestari

Random notes that I managed to jot down:
“Only Dead fishes swim with the flow of water.” How about living fishes? What does it mean? Can anyone of you tell me? Then he talked about self-actualization. Self actualization is the process of striving to actualize one’s potential capacity, abilities, and talents. One must do what he or she can do. How to reach this higher level of Maslow’s theory? Firstly, we need to vary our lifestyles. My own example would be dancing while jogging? Secondly, we need to have goal! Without a goal is like a hunter holding a gun and no idea where to shoot the flying bird. Great people are really ordinary people who commit themselves to extraordinary goals. Then he talked about some criterions of workers that needed in the job market in the future based on research done by Harvard University. The criterions are high cognitive thinking skills, critical thinking, good communication skills, good problem solving skills, espirit de corps, eager to learn new things, and possess high intrinsic motivation. Open your hearts, open your mind, you would not easily open your clothes! Then come to conclusion which is the best part I like! Study from University of Massachusetts has shown that people say, ‘I love my work’ would hardly get heart diseases. Instantly after that I said it to myself, ‘I love my work!’ (1000 times). Yeah, I won’t get heart diseases anymore. Do you enjoy your work? If not then find a way to quit or else say it insincerely ‘I love my work?’ Overall I enjoyed 2 hours free motivation talk. With his cool sense of humour, he managed to talk 2 hours without saying to us, ‘okay ladies and gentlemen, now you can take 5!’ because today is called motivating Monday!

Relief! The head invigilator announced those sweet words I long to hear, “You may exit the class now”. I felt myself flying very high up to the sky. Although examination is over, it is not an end in itself. Learning definitely is a life-long process and I am thirsting to learn more and more. Let’s  back to the subject!

Does it look comparable to Titanic carrying 73 passengers? It is real Titanic! It is back! It is a Journey not to reach a destination. I would say half journey to achieve our mission. I would say journey to uncertainty. Cohort 4 Philharmonic orchestra is conducting a piece of symphony. A sweet melodies played by Cohort 4 entitled, ‘One Moment In Time’ by Whitney Houston. We present its inaugural performance under the Music Director, Sir Aaron. I raise my hand. All the instruments –violin, clarinet, horn, trumpet, viola, cello, keyboard and flute are ready. Standing ovation, a remarkable example of harmony among different cultures and states from Kelantan to ‘the land below the wind’, we play with one band one sound:

Each day I live
I want to be a day to give the best of me
I’m only one, but not alone
My finest day is yet unknown
I broke my heart for every gain
To taste the sweet, I faced the pain
I rise and fall,
Yet through it all this much remains

I want one moment in time
When I’m more than I thought I could be
When all of my dreams
Are a heart beat away
And the answers are all up to me
Give me one moment in time
When I’m racing with destiny
Then in that one moment of time
I will feel, I will feel eternity

I’ve lived to be the very best
I want it all, no time for less
I’ve laid the plans
Now lay the chance here in my hands

Give me one moment in time
When I’m more than I thought I could be
When all of my dreams
Are a heart beat away
And the answers are all up to me
Give me one moment in time
When I’m racing with destiny
Then in that one moment of time
I will feel, I will feel eternity

You’re a winner for a lifetime
If you seize that one moment in time
Make it shine

Give me one moment in time
When I’m more than I thought I could be
When all of my dreams
Are a heart beat away
And the answers are all up to me
Give me one moment in time
When I’m racing with destiny
Then in that one moment of time
I will be, I will be, I will be free

I will be, I will be free

The song is simply inspiring and powerful. ‘ I’m only one, but not alone, my finest day is yet unknown.’ The greatest part of all is watching how a certain group of people with contrasting personalities get along and watching how friendship grows. Moving on from port IPIK to port UM, no one can impede the ship from moving! No matter how hard we try to oppose it, no matter how we fight back, change will continually happen in our life. We have changed. All of us! I don’t know in what way or how much, for better or worse. Me? I learnt gradually the art of learning and teaching in English. Of couse one thing is discovering different personalities of individuals!

Once in awhile I would look back at collection of pictures and laugh. Recalling how we used to be. Be it all the silly things we did together and things we used to complain about. Those sweet smiles and laughters were captured. But time never goes back, it never rewinds. Never! So all we can do is ensuring that those smiles and laughter do not fade into a mere memory of you and me. Let it be something we experience in the present for as long as possible.

If there’s anything that you could change about the past we had together, what would it be? I was ruminating, then I realised that I would change nothing. Yes, we had moments where we disliked each other, times when there were conflicts and times when we blame the other been wrong. But without those moments, we wouldn’t have learnt something. Some of us may have grown apart a little; some of us are bonded even closer. Anyhow, we still have our weekly mamak stalls to gather round later and for that I am thankful! Inspired by a song, I proudly sing in G chord in the bathroom ‘I’m only one, but not alone, my finest day is yet unknown ‘.

How sweet the Victory that bore my shame! Taking the burden of my sin away! How great the goodness God has shown! Once strangers. Now we’re called His own. One day in Heaven, our eyes will meet. And our cry will still be: “Hallelujah! What a Saviour! Hallelujah! What a King!” Blessed Easter!

Guess what? I love March! Indeed I have learned a lot during the month of horrible March. The description given to March is contradicting with what I have said earlier. Yeah, everything turns into normal now. Right now, I can have plenty time to replace my sleepless nights. Due to lack of sweet dreams at night, my neck cannot be twisted either left or right. If I were dared to twist, you could hear me shout, ‘Ouch!’ The sudden pain was one of the symptoms of stress. It is normal! Stress can be good or harmful. It depends on how ‘homo sapiens’ deal or perceive with it. Frankly speaking, stresses that I had gone through more or less rejuvenated my mind. It warns me to appreciate time. It teaches me how to manage time. In term of stress management, I would say I cope it quite well this time compared to my 2 years of Foundation. There is still room for improvement and I will not allow one of the bricks in the building falls down to my head. Praying Rosary by following and holding beads by beads either in wee hours of the morning or midnight, hail, Mary, full of Grace indeed is watching me and protecting me especially during the season of Lent. I felt calmness and peacefulness each time I finished the prayer.

Since nightmare was considered over, I invited Zul and Alif to go jogging with me at Permaisuri Lake in the morning to check whether we are still physically fit or not. I was happy as lark! I was over the Jupiter! I was in seventh heaven! Perhaps, I am running out of idioms. I jog for 3 rounds which I guess 7 rounds of standard football field. Calculator is needed here! It meant that I was physically fit. Horse power! But my muscles were quite painful now since I have not been jogging for about 2 months. I think my body felt goose bump with my performance. Forgot to mention, I didn’t jog for non-stop. Gotcha! But first round jog I stopped when I reached the group of pretty aunties doing ‘cha cha’ dance. I stopped because I afraid I will bump into their bodies. Jogging indeed is good exercise for everyone. Jogging is not discriminating. All walks of people can do it. I saw young, elderly, couples, singles, pretty girls, family, and children. They were jogging with purpose. Without purpose, they will not wake up early in the morning running madly like Forest Gump. Ouch, Forest Gump did have purpose of running. Stressing the importance of jogging one more time, it is very good for our health. Jogging is good for our hearts. Jogging can help burn up our bodies’ fat. Jogging is one of the anti-aging methods. No wonder the group of aunties dancing and twisting their booties was looking energetic and gorgeous. Half way of my jogging, I had chance to see the art of Tai Chi. There were some elderly seemed following the instruction given by the master. Tai Chi wasn’t for me. Just like yoga I find it too slow, I can never seem to shut my mind off completely and focus on the task at hand. So I have decided to give hand boxing a try while I was jogging. Imaginatively, I figured beating someone or something even if it’s the air up at this point may do me some good! Without realization, I was sweating a lot at my back which meant I am healthy, physically fit.

3 rounds of jogging finally came to an end. I have conquered Permaisuri Lake with only 3 rounds. Reaching destination but no one announce me as a winner. Embarrassingly, when imaginary fish as a judge told me that no one is competing with me. I now realized there was really no one competing with me. Therefore, everyone was declaring themselves as a winner depend the limit or goal that have been set by everyone of us. By Jogging, we are actually competing with ourselves. By jogging, we are actually motivated by seeing others running to reach the destination. We learnt to be more patience and never give up. By Jogging, I can vividly see my future dream. A sense of family togetherness cropped up when I saw parents bringing their children together to burn up fat. Besides, future Wong Mei Choo and Lee Choong Wei were also there because I saw parents playing badminton with their small kids. Oh my ‘dog’, dog also wanted to burn up some fat while seeing this pretty girl bringing along her ‘Marley’. If I were found out her dog shitting at the lake, I will instantly call the security guard to send her love letter. Many scenes I came across. I took a very last deep inhale and exhale in front of Permaisuri Lake.Shouting silently, ‘What a wonderful day!’ Thank to Creative MP4 blasting orchestra songs to boost my jogging.  After that, I knew 1500ml of plain water desperately waiting for me. Physically fit? Checked! I end this entry by quoting:

I live by a hill. I began walking it and then I began jogging it and then I began sprinting it.
Tea Leoni

I was working on the farm to get in shape, about a mile away from my parents. You know, I did everything as a kid to stay in shape - jogging, work on the farm, driving the tractor. I’ll never forget.
Guy Lafleur

I went jogging up on Mulholland. In the middle of my run I had some form of asthma attack and couldn’t even walk. I couldn’t get a ride one block to my house. I thought I was going to die.
Esai Morales

Jogging is very beneficial. It’s good for your legs and your feet. It’s also very good for the ground. If makes it feel needed.
Charles M. Schulz

Laughter is inner jogging.
Norman Cousins

Since then, I have not missed five consecutive days in getting some type of aerobic exercise, mostly jogging.
Kenneth H. Cooper

The only reason I would take up jogging is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.
Erma Bombeck

The pleasure of jogging and running is rather like that of wearing a fur coat in Texas in August: the true joy comes in being able to take the damn thing off.
Joseph Epstein

The trouble with jogging is that the ice falls out of your glass.
Martin Mull

When people ask me what I do, strangers on a plane, perhaps, I tell them that I think. Thinking is excellent exercise, as much as swimming or jogging.
Tom Glazer

I hope I can skip March! But March likes me so much! Yes, March is a female. March is not a month! Since she likes me so much, why not I give her a chance? Through communication, I will know the strengths and weaknesses of March. March gives me piles of piles of assignment. Instead of mourning, I would prefer to stand on top of the mountain and shout I LOVE YOU! March is testing my passion. I am neither fragile nor vulnerable. Passion will blaze within me. Assignments bring me no time to decode novels. No worries, 5 pages a day is enough. Instead of blaming March, I will try my best to appreciate you, March! March, you will be fixated by me on “learning” rather than “earning”. March is the deadlines. Where would I be without deadlines? If I turn in my assignments after the deadline, imagine how crocodile is chasing me and I jump into the pond. In the midst of trial and turbulence, I meditate:

The Lord is my light and my salvation whom shall I fear?

The Lord is the rampart of my life; I will not be afraid.

When the wicked rush at me to devour my flesh,

It is my foes who stumble, my enemies fall.

Though an army encamps against me, my heart will not fail;

Though war break out against me, I will still be confident.

One thing I ask of the Lord, one thing I seek

That I may dwell in his house all the days of my life,

To gaze at his jewel and to visit his sanctuary.

For he will keep me safe in his shelter

In times of misfortune;

He will hide me beneath his roof,

And set me high upon a rock.

Then my head will be lifted up over the enemies round about me.

I will offer sacrifices at his Tent with shouts of joy;

I will sing and make music in praise of the Lord.

Hear my voice when I call, O Lord,

Have mercy on me and answer.

My heart says to you, I seek your face, O Lord.

Do not hide your face from me nor turn away your servant in anger.

You are my protector, do not reject me

Abandon me not, O God my savior!

Though my father and mother forsake me,

Yet will the Lord receive me.

Teach me, O Lord your way; lead me along a straight path.

Save me from the plot of my enemies,

For false witnesses have risen against me

to pin me down in their violence.

I hope, I am sure,

That I wil see the goodness of the Lord

In the land of the living

Trust in the Lord, be strong and courageous

Yes, put your hope in the Lord

(PSALM 27: 1-14 )

I sat quietly and have one last talk with God.‘God,’ I said. ‘Can you give me one good reason not to quit?’ His answer surprised me. ‘Look around,’ he said. ‘Do you see the fern and the bamboo?’ ‘Yes,’ I replied. ‘When I planted the fern and the bamboo seeds, I took very good care of them. I gave them light. I gave them water. The fern quickly grew from the earth. Its brilliant green covered the floor. Yet nothing came from the bamboo seed. But I did not quit on the bamboo. ‘In the second year the Fern grew more vibrant and plentiful. And again, nothing came from the bamboo seed. But I did not quit on the bamboo. In the third year, there was still nothing from the bamboo seed. But I would not quit. ‘In the fourth year, again, there was nothing from the bamboo seed. But I would not quit. ‘Then in the fifth year a tiny sprout emerged from the earth. Compared to the fern it was seemingly small and insignificant. ‘But just six months later the bamboo rose to over 100 feet tall. It had spent the five years growing roots. Those roots made it strong and gave it what it needed to survive.’

He then said to me, ‘Did you know, my child, that all this time you have been struggling, you have actually been growing roots. I would not quit on the bamboo. I will never quit on you. Don’t compare yourself to others. ‘The bamboo had a different purpose than the fern, yet, the both make the forest beautiful. Your time will come and you will rise high!’ ‘Good days give you happiness. Bad days give you experience. Both are essential to life, so keep going.’

Tuning into lite and easy radio station, the sentimental music from yesterday and today vibrating into my ears gives me an initial sense of euphoria and a relaxed environment and yet I feel de-motivated. I just cannot give you my broad smile. To de-stress, I even turned down an unexpected invitation from my friend to go to karaoke and movies. My low-pitched voice would only be heard at the bathroom chasing away all the unwanted guests. Perhaps this entry would remind me to NEVER GIVE UP. I have experienced falling down and I became strong again many times. That is ME, MYSELF and I.

As I was setting my goal and gaining better results this new semester, I have failed two quizzes. These two courses which are speaking and listening give me a hard time exactly as I had expected. I just listen in one ear and out the other, speaking rock back and forth. Can someone give me inspiration like ‘You are such a dumb ox?’ I can accept that. Two courses appeal me most this semester: thinking & communication skills (CCTS) and child psychology. To think critically and not to judge things easily is what I have learned during CCTS. Reading newspaper needs a longer time now. For Child Psychology, it explains the basic principles, major concepts and chronological milestones underlining normal growth and development from birth to adolescence. If possible, I want to pursue PHD on Educational Psychology. She (the lecturer) is superb. Move on to lesson planning. It seems a daunting task for me. I need to give full attention to it. I see lesson planning like a surgeon equipped with medical knowledge before he enters the operating room. How do you choose a topic? Which order do you do the tasks in? What if you run out of time? What if you run out of materials? Ah! So many things to think about!

I walked around the class next door during the free hours a few weeks ago. Since there was no one in the class, I flipped on The STAR newspaper and saw this puzzle game called SUDOKU. Bringing this puzzle back to my class, I succumbed and got addicted to solve the puzzle. Never underestimate SUDOKU! Playing it a few times slowly improves my concentration. No math is needed to complete the puzzles, and no guessing should be necessary either. It nurtures logical mathematical intelligence. Hopefully these logic puzzles make my brain smarter and even halt the progress of Alzheimer’s disease. I realized people good at Sudoku are also good at languages. Is that true? Logically speaking, I would say no. I know the way to nurture verbal linguistic intelligence. That is simply through read and reading.

Do you read blogs? Tell you what. Lately, I read all the blogs from theological to political point of views. I am just wondering why people treat blog as news. Why?Look for Oxford Advanced Learner’s Dictionary 7^th edition and flip to page 153. I proceed to my logical thought on blogs. There is NOTHING in this world that he or she can’t or shouldn’t blog about. It is the people who read what particular blogs about that becomes a problem. No one held an elephant over your head and coerced you into reading it.Ever thought of that? A blog is not a discussion forum with stringent rules. A blog is not a heavily censored television show. No matter how famous and widely publicized it becomes. It is a space meant for personal thoughts that are bound to be provoking and disagreeable, whether you like it or not. If you want to be happy with everything that you read, then don’t read blogs. I would suggest you to read children books. Think critically. Human are able to judge whether it is good or bad.

You have probably watched Beijing Olympic last month? Would you like to share which moment gave you a SHOCK? For me, a dropped baton. The United States team suffered twice. First in the men’s 4×100m and again in the women’s 4×100m race. A dropped baton, during the exchange between the penultimate and final runner, means wasted time and a sure loss. Ask them: could they predict the dropped baton? They could not, but they have learned perhaps not to take anything for granted, even the simple passing of a baton. Usain Bolt was simply fantastic. He won a gold medal with 9.69 seconds run in 100m. He grabbed gold in 200m run as well. Another crazy guy is Michael Phelps. Timing myself that day, inspired and acting like him in swimming pool, I would only make approximately 8 minutes for 100m. Kudos to Michael Phelps.

By now, charming and saintly Cheryl has settled down in UK. I will be missing you these three years. I won’t forget how wonderful it was, when we met the first time in an unexpected way. Thanks for your prayer. Thanks for your last advice : ‘Patience. Nothing comes easy in life. The longer the climb, the more beautiful the view at the top. Keep working hard. Your labour will bear fruit one day.’I know what you meant. I would take it step by step, simply concentrating on the act of studying. All the best and let’s work hard to achieve our dreams. When we are in the present, let’s give full focus to it. The presence will flow and transform what we do. How about in the future? Take it easy. You will see the value in patience.

Wakakaahem..UmmHahahahaha.(coughing actually). To all of my friends who played prank on me, the prize of the flour cheap-hor? You guys were so bad. I am now officially announced that I am 21 years old. Birthday celebration for this year will be my sweetest and unforgettable one. Thanks for everything. I love the cakes. Can I have more sushi? Thanks chief for your spaghetti. Thanks for the drinks.Thanks for the clothes. The verse is awesome. Wearing it turning me into new muscular outlook, I need to gear up now. May infinitely rich Father bless you all.

Ps: To all my Moslem friends, Selamat Hari Raya, patik memohon maaf zahir dan batin! Never ever forget to bring back ketupat-s,dodol-s,lemang-s,and cookies. Typing them also make me mouth-watering.

My jobless daddy subscribed to ASTRO early last month. With ASTRO, I can watch a variety of programmes suited to my liking and my mood. It’s a far cry from my growing-up years when there were only RTM1 and RTM2. In Tenom, I can say that my family was the last one to have set up ASTRO. ASTRO? I only made friends with ASTRO when I was studying in KL. With ASTRO set up in hostel 1 year ago, I was one of the conquerors. Wednesday is my favourite day because of the latest season of CSI: Crime Scene Investigation airs on AXN. Too bad I missed the previous season. Oh gosh, I shall watch the episode where Grisson proposes to Sidle. How does this cool man make it?

Another show which I enjoy is House, also on AXN. I marvel at the deftly-woven script. I never thought a medical doctor as eccentric as House could get away with so many unorthodox decisions. It’s all so hilarious, horrific and touching, all at the same time. The latest season of House is coming. Hooray. Not forgetting to mention Fear Factor.

The learning channels, comprising Discovery Channel, National Geographic, Animal planet and History Channel, open my eyes to the wonders out there. Lately, I succumbed to The Oprah Winfrey Show. Her inspiring, life-changing talk show provides a venue for discussion of various topics, current issues and contemporary lifestyles. There is a woman from Australia who discovered the baby language. There is a man leaving Microsoft Company because he wants to help the kids to build a library in Nepal. I long for ASTRO whereas the kids in Nepal long for books. His target is to collect 2.5 billion books by year 2020. There is a woman who shared how she was verbally and physically abused by her husband. Suzan gave tips on how to manage your money. All these people shared their experience, and give inspiration to people.

I’d prefer to walk at Yosemite National Park to experience nature first-hand, but I’d have to save up for a trip there. And I’d love to go to Sydney, London, Paris, and Tokyo, but being a city denizen all my life has dulled my survival instincts. Travel and Living channel saves me.

Hence, ASTRO is such a marvel. Entertainment, knowledge and current events are at your fingertips. Yes, speaking of current events, there are the news channels. I never thought that I’d see the day when I can watch news 24 hours a day. Be it BBC, CNN, CCTV9, Al-Jazeera (English and Arabic) or Bloomberg, rest assured that no one can miss what’s going on anywhere in the world. For news with local perspectives, Awani and lately Bernama TV couldn’t have come at a better time. Sad to say there is no channels like SuperSport. Why not go for a jog? Talking about jogging, I met my principal from ex secondary school. Besides, I met my superb ex physic and chemistry teacher as well. Right now, she has 3 cute children. You can look for this teacher in my Friendster photos if you are eager to know how brilliant she is.

Pay-per-view gives one more choice. We’re just so spoiled for choice. Talking about choice, I am reading ‘The Choice’ by Nicholas Sparks. My aim to finish 2 novels is almost reached since I have finished reading  ‘The Notebook’ by Nicholas Sparks again. I wish I could live happily ever after like Noah and Allie. Frankly speaking, I sometimes don’t know which programme to watch and I don’t have the time for TV. With ASTRO, my holiday is just another assignment for me to improve my language proficiency. Choose right and think twice, I am glad to wake up at 6am. The ntv7 breakfast shows at 8am indeed is worth waking up for. Although it is not a full-package subscription, I want to say two last words: thanks daddy.